Ethnic Rhyming Can Be Stymieing – A Short Story

“People say I can’t rhyme ’cause I’m white/ Those critics are just looking for a fight/ Short, stout, and Italian I may be/ But my skills are a tasty delicacy.”

“Thank you…uh…Mr. MC Ravioli but I don’t think the hip-hop world is too receptive to an Italian flavor of Vanilla Ice. We’re really not interested in some one hit wonder.”

“Don’t be so quick to blunder/ Ask any fool who hears me MC/ And they call me a regular prodigy/ My words speed up your metabolism/ Black, Jew, Indian, any organism.”

“Yes, I’m sure the kids love you, but we do have a scheduled 1:00 meeting…”

“We just started swinging/ My parties last all night/ You know they gotta be out of sight.”

“Your non-stop rhyming is really getting tiresome.”

“Forget about it with Coke and Rum/ Are you digging my gift/ It sure gives my ma a spiritual lift.”

“Security! Can someone from security get this bum out of here!”

“Shit, means I’m not recording this year!”

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