Pablo Chiste’s Inbox

About a month ago I received the below e-mail under the subject heading Improvisacion…

Pablo, ayudame por favor. Tengo un amigo que se llama Richard D—–. Es un escritor maravilloso, te lo juro. Se que eres un editor, y pienso que deberias ayundarle. Sin duda tu tiempo es precioso en tu empleo.  Pero tu y el tenias sangre Española, y tambien se que el te respeta. Y ademas es un hombre tremendo. Por favor, hazlo por todos los escritores que has conocido que estan buscando la luz en un mundo de obscuridad.

Tu Mejor Nuevo Amigo,

Rico C——-

This is how it is translated by the computer… with the subject heading Improvisation…
Pablo,  help me please. I have a friend,  Richard D—–. He Is a marvelous writer, I swear . Since you are a publisher,  I think you should help him. Without doubt your time is precious in your employment. But your and the tapeworms Spanish blood, and tambien itself that the respects you. And he is a tremendous man. Please, do it for all the writers that you have known that are seeking the light in a world of darkness.

Your New Best Friend,

 Rich C——-

I let that e-mail stew in my in-box for a month before I finally gave in and accepted that I could not write a fluid response in Spanish. Below is the English language e-mail I sent Rico.

Rico,

Many apologies for the delayed response. My time has been very scarce. I would love to read your friend’s work and provide any assistance I may. Please mail the manuscript to my agent at the below address

6315 1/2 Orange St.

Los Angeles, CA 90048

Vayas Con Dios,

Pablo Chiste 

 If this is an elaborate prank then game on…

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2 thoughts on “Pablo Chiste’s Inbox

  1. But your and the tapeworms Spanish blood, and tambien itself that the respects you.

    WTF??? Dude you need a Dell!lol I love the fact that apparently tambien translates tambien in English.lol Just to shine him on you should have put in, “Y tu mama tambien” which means, “And your mother, too.”lmao

    But very nice of you to give him your agent’s address like that. At least he knows you’re trying.

    STUPID MACHINES!

    Estabilidad y desarrollo. (translation: Live long and prosper).

  2. I started making changes with the translation, but I thought loyal readers would get a kick out of it.
    Computer Translation :He lazy is.

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