Happy New Year! It Would Be If I Could Stop Worrying

 

I’m really at a loss of what to wear this New Year’s Eve. I got used to wearing those novelty glasses where the 00’s in 2003 or 2008 served as the eyepieces. Even last year I found a pair of glasses where the 1 in 2010 laid flatly on your nose while the surrounding zeros allowed both my eyes a field of vision. With only one zero for the rest of the tens will I be forced to have in essence a novelty monacle for the rest of the decade? I don’t know if I can handle that look because coupled with my New Year’s Eve top hat I might bear too strong a resemblance to Mr. Peanut.

I stole that joke from a Seinfeld episode which brings up another New Year’s concern. It has been thirteen years now since that show has been cancelled. Children will be bar mitzvahed this year that weren’t even born when the last episode premiered. How much longer will we be allowed to reference Seinfeld? I don’t recall in my youth people comparing things to Archie Bunker or I Love Lucy as much as I still hear how particular social situations are reminiscent to what George Costanza went through. Should I start watching Two And A Half Men so I can remain conversationally relevant with the next generation?

The 00s and the 10s of the twentieth century were historically rich. It featured the invention of flight and the war to end all wars. But we never came up with a name for either decade. We had the roaring twenties. They even called the 1890’s the gay nineties, but nothing for the  first twenty years of the last century. They were the lost years. I think Hemingway even called his peers the Lost Generation. So will there be any historical significance to the rest of this decade? Or will anyone care that we spent much of this era wearing novelty items and watching Seinfeld?

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