I understand the novelty of being in Miami and seeing a store selling a t-shirt that says, “I’m in Miami Bitch” and buying said garment. It is kind of funny because you are in Miami and it’s pretty ironic that there is a song with the same title. But what about the children?
Some innocent seven year old tyke sees this t-shirt on a French guy with a third degree sunburn and all of a sudden the kid’s parents are in a precarious position. The kid just learned to read and that past Christmas found out there was no Santa Claus and he asks his parents, “Mom, Dad, what’s a bitch?”
“Well little Timmy… um… remember Lassie, she was a bitch.”
“Dogs can read?”
“Um… some can.”
“I want a bitch.”
Child services overhears such talk and little Timmy goes away to foster care.
There are other foul worded shirts roaming around the streets. Just the other day I saw a girl wearing a shirt saying, “It’s my birthday bitch.” Now I’m left wondering if it actually was the girl’s birthday or did someone buy it for her birthday and it was laundry day and she had to other clothes to wear? The shirt looked slightly worn so my best guess is it was a present from last year’s birthday and she was having another birthday and decided to get more use out of the gift.
But what’s with offending absolute strangers? Am I likely to buy a birthday girl a drink after her cursing at me? No. I recommend lushes to instead wear a complimentary shirt that says something along the lines of, “It’s my birthday, Handsome.”
But my favorite and most thought provoking of shirts sporting obscenities was one I saw a young man wearing proudly that stated, “No Bitchassness.” I’m not exactly certain what that word means, but by the sentence structure I appreciate that instead of insulting me, he was simply laying down the law.