Super Blah XLVI – Where The Most Interesting Player Isn’t On The Field

People make a big deal out of the Super Bowl, but unless you’re a New York Giants or New England Patriots fan the game has less relevance than any regular season contest. At least in a week one showdown between the Jaguars and the Titans fantasy football is still at play, so I have a player I want to succeed or fail. But watching this Super Bowl in 2012 between New York and Boston leaves me as excited as a war between Germany and the Soviet Union would in 1940.

I suppose I’m leaning for the Patriots because I picked them in the preseason, but that’s like rooting for Germany in 1940 because you want Hitler’s mustache to catch on in the fashion world over Stalin’s.

It is in poor taste to laugh about brutal dictators and so I won’t make any jokes about Bill Belichick or Tom Coughlin, but as a Miami Dolphins fan I’ve learned the only thing more obnoxious than Boston sports fans are New York sports fans and vice versa. So what excites me about this Super Bowl?

I want to see the ads for this summer’s comic book movies, but really I’m hoping to sneak a peek of Peyton Manning wearing Miami Dolphins colors. Peyton Manning, the quarterback of the Indianapolis Colts, is one of the top players to ever throw the old pigskin. Rumor has it that the owner of his current team, Jim Irsay, is going to cut ties with Manning because he’s old and is coming off a missed year due to neck surgery. .

While it seems unlikely that the Dolphins could recruit Manning, there are teams that are closer to contention than the Dolphins that need a quarterback like the San Francisco 49ers or the New York Jets, but Miami does have a few things going for it. The first being that history repeats itself. No one saw LeBron James coming to play for the Miami Heat (besides me), but now he is, and if the preeminent basketball player of the 21st century chose Miami as his place of occupation why wouldn’t the preeminent football player?

Second, the Dolphins owner, Stephen Ross, while being a cheapskate toward paying players and coaches is a celebrity groupie, He gave shares of ownership of the team to Jennifer Lopez, Fergie, and Jimmy Buffet just to hang out with him, imagine what he’d give Peyton, who’s more famous than them all, and can throw a football fifty yards.

Thirdly, and most importantly the old and infirm don’t move to Northern California or the Northeast to wait out death. They go to South Florida where we’ve got more early bird specials than you can shake a stick at. Would Peyton rather play in arctic conditions or balmy Miami where the warm breeze will keep his arthritic joints spry?

In this pass happy league of the NFL the only position that is truly crucial is the quarterback. Manning, even if he has trouble moving his neck, would turn a mediocre team like the Dolphins into instant favorites for the next year and might make Miami fans care about the 2013 Super Bowl for more reasons than to catch commercials of the new Iron Man movie.


3 thoughts on “Super Blah XLVI – Where The Most Interesting Player Isn’t On The Field

  1. Keep on dreamin there, Pablo! P. Manning will never leave Indy, unless God Himself comes down out of Heaven and starts quarterbacking the Colts. Which that seems to be what they needed this past

    Truthfully, I’m undecided who I want to see win. Like you, I like the Patriots to pull it off, along with the vengeance factor they have against New York for wrecking their perfect season in 2007. But, I also think it would be cool to see a Manning win in a Super Bowl in Indy.

    Back to the stuff about Peyton, he’s well passed his prime, whereas Lebron was right in the midst of it, with still more to come when he made the move to Miami. So don’t get your hopes up on P. Manning coming there. He might be close to retirement in football years, but nowhere near in life.

    Besides, Miami, lately, is where football players go to die, much like New Orleans, or Tampa Bay, or Atlanta were. Not a way for a storied franchise to be treated, but until the mindset changes the Dolphins won’t be in a Super Bowl anytime soon.

    At least in Ace Ventura they got their due.

    But also like you, I’m looking forward to the commercials. That’s the best part of the Super Bowl anyway, right before the

    • Everything points toward the Colts owner cutting Peyton to avoid paying two exorbitant salaries for one position. We’ll see where he ends up.

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