I never realized why I signed up for Twitter until I read the following “tweets” all delivered in somewhat rapid succession by the same “tweeter”.
2:00 PM You ever leave the house after a shower and forget to put deodorant on haha
2:15 PM Had to buy some on the way to the destination. (A picture of deodorant included in tweet).
2:25 PM I have the belief that I can walk in a room and walk out with your girlfriend.
After reading these comments (which I swear to God were actually posted using those exact words and in that exact order) I now understand the usefulness of Twitter. It is a way to show your true self to the world. In case you’re not following me @pablochiste here is a diary of my most recent tweets.
9:07 AM Just woke up. What up world?
12:03 PM Grabbed some lunch. Bean burritos are the bomb!
1:01 PM Stomach feels weird.
1:05 PM Liquid explosion!
1:07 PM Don’t you hate public bathrooms. They never have soap.
1:11 PM. Just ran into @DanJones. Dude must be working out. Has a real firm handshake.
3:52 PM Miami drivers are so rude.
3:53 PM Honking your horn just makes me drive slower.
3:54 PM I’m not moving til I finish this tweet.
4:11 PM I hate cops. A ticket for obstructing traffic?
6:12 PM Eating peanut butter straight out of the jar is yummy.
6:34 PM Plucking out a gray hair.
7:02 PM FML! Someone thought I had poop in my hair. Then remembered peanut butter. Lol
7:42 PM Watching basketball.
8:34 PM I heart beer ads.
9:25 PM #MiamiHeat suck!
9:52 PM #MiamiHeat will be world champs!
11:25 PM I hate inconsistent people.
1:22 AM Someone wanted to do lunch tomorrow. I told him real entrepreneurs like me are too busy for lunch.
1:52 AM Bedtime. Early morning brunch meeting at noon.